How to Overcome Shyness0

overcome shyness

Excessive shyness or being overly bashful is a sign of insecurity, lack of confidence, a low self-image, and low self-esteem. When you are shy, you feel unsure of yourself especially in the company of others.

Some bad experiences during childhood could have caused you to become timid and withdrawn.

Timidity can affect the outcome of your goals, your success with relationships, and your life. When you are uncomfortable among others, you can’t talk, express your opinions or ask for favors.

Shy people have difficulty in starting and developing relationships because of the fear of rejection, being embarrassed and making mistakes. Shy people are self-conscious and are concerned about how and what other people see and think of them

8 Tips on How to Overcome Shyness

1. Be Aware of the Positive Intention

There is a positive intention in your behavior. Most likely you are trying to protect yourself from looking or feeling like a fool.

Listen to yourself. Your words are powerful.

Stop focusing on your weakness. The more often you label yourself as a shy person, the more your subconscious mind agrees and prove to you that you are right.

Make a conscious effort to observe and listen to your inner chatters. Interrupt, question and fight back the negative self-talk.

2. Picture the End in Your Mind

Another great way to overcome shyness is to imagine the best possible outcome of a situation. In your mind, you can do anything including making the first move, talking in public and being assertive. Consistently practice becoming the person you want to become in your mind.

Through practice and repetition, you are able to “act as if” you are confident and soon you will become good at it.

3. Get Rid of Self-Doubt

Refuse to give in to fear and self-doubt. The past is over with faults and mistakes. You are a grown up and can act differently.

List down on a piece of paper why you are shying away from people and why you are afraid to speak up. Then write down what you expect from yourself and why it is important that you overcome the timidity.

4. Connect and Interact with Others

overcome shyness by hanging out with better people

Put in the effort to connect with others especially those who have positive qualities. Listen, observe and learn. These people will subtly influence your behavior and your thinking. Go out and join their company. Sitting home and shying away won’t help you become bold.

5. Recall and Recreate Situations When You Were Not Shy

Do you admit that you are not always shy? Try to recall the times when you acted confidently in the presence of other people.

Probably you were in the company of people who made you feel comfortable or when you were too engrossed with what you were doing to notice. Recall what you did and how you felt then. You succeeded before. You can do it again.

6. Understand that People are Caught Up in Their Own World

The trouble with self-conscious individuals is that they think that other people are concerned about how they look and perform. Yes, there are judgmental people out there. But do you know that most of them are insecure and look for the weaknesses in others to validate their own worth?

If you can keep that in mind, you’d go about living your life and not be bothered of what others think of you.

Most humans are so caught up in their own world and don’t actually care much about you. Don’t worry about trying to impress. Work on yourself. Strive to become a better inner and outer person and you’ll walk, talk and act confidently.

7. Use Alternative Methods

There are a few tools that can assist you to overcome shyness. One of them is self-hypnosis. Another tool is emotional freedom technique or also known to most people as EFT tapping.

Here is a video that shows how EFT tapping is done. Just tap along with Brad Yates and discover it for yourself.

Take One Small Step Each Day

It is not easy to change overnight. What you can do is to take small steps consistently.

You can begin by giving a smile to someone whom you have been afraid to start a conversation. What you can do the next day is to ask for the time or just say Hello.

What’s important is to do something every day to build up your confidence.


You were not born a shy person. So, it is something that you can undo. It will take some time and effort to override your old mental conditioning and identity.

You can do it.

Give yourself the chance to have fun and more joy in life.

Do you have another tip to add? Share it.